Fear, the sensation starts in your stomach, spreading out into your limbs, freezing you into immobility. Holding you back from achieving your goals. Keeping you from accomplishing your heartfelt desires.
Does this happen to you? Do you feel fear? Well, we’re going to take a look at how to overcome that right now. Stick around!
Good Fear vs Bad Fear
Today, I want to talk to you about fear. This is something that we have all experienced. There are good kinds of fear and there are bad kinds of fear.
The good kinds of fear keep us safe, they protect us from things. If you are walking towards a cliff face and you want to stay away from the edge. Or you’re in the kitchen and there’s a burner and you want to keep your hand away. We can all agree that these are good fears.
Then there are bad kinds of fear. The kind that holds you back and prevents you from accomplishing what you need to accomplish in your life.
This is the kind of fear that we’re going to look at today.
Laughing At Fear
Let me tell you a story. This is from one of my favorite books, The Belgariad. There is a beloved character, Mandorallen, and he is the bravest
knight in all the land. He has never experienced fear ever in his life, until one battle when he encounters something that actually makes him afraid.
Suddenly, he now has this new sensation to deal with and what concerns him the most is that he is now afraid that he will let down his companions when they need him most. He shares his fears with a friend, who tells him what he does when he’s afraid. The friend tells Mandorallen that he laughs at his fears.
Now Mandorallen takes this advice and the next time that they go into battle, which is a very serious thing, and they’re drawing swords and raising shields, all of a sudden all anyone can hear is Mandorallen laughing at the
top of his lungs. A very simple man, he took his friend’s advice quite literally and laughed at his fears.
Four Simple Techniques To Fight Your Fears
I want to give you some techniques you can use against your fears. Follow this list from top to bottom and you’ll feel better, I promise.
Step One: Stand Up Strong
The next time you feel an overwhelming sense of fear, I want you to stand up and solidly plant your feet about shoulder width apart. Place your hands on your hips and square off your shoulders. Drop your shoulders if they’re raised up around your ears, but don’t droop.
Raise your chin, ever so slightly, and stand up tall. This is the superhero stance. Psychologically, this stance will give you power over those bad fears.
Step Two: Take A Cleansing Breath
Next, I want you to deliberately take a nice deep cleansing breath and hold it just for a bit.
Not enough to get dizzy, but long enough that you can feel the oxygen filling your lungs and expanding your diaphragm. Feel this energy reaching out into your body, into your limbs, and filling up your blood.
Then let it out. Let it out explosively if you want. Let it go. Let out all those fears, all that anxiety, all that tension. Let it come out with the breath.
I want you to do that a few more times. Take as many breaths as you need until you can feel your heart rate start to slow down. Stay in the superhero pose this whole time.
Step Three: Fake It Until You Make It
Now I want you to smile.
This is probably the last thing you want to do. It’s going to feel strange and it’s going to feel fake.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying fake it until you make it. Well, we’re going to fake it until we make it, because what we’re doing is telling our bodies to smile which is going to tell our brains to smile.
There’s a connection here. We’re opening the synapses and starting the signals traveling back and forth. Think about the knight Mandorallen and laugh.
It doesn’t matter how fake it sounds! You’re telling your body something very important. You are telling the fears to take a hike for good.
Step Four: Don’t Isolate Yourself
I want you to repeat after me:
one more time:
Fear breeds in dark, quiet, lonely places. I want you to know that you are not alone anymore. I will be with you. You can reach out to me and I will answer. There are other people out there who will respond. There are groups of people who are waiting to be connected to people like you.
I know this because it happened to me. I felt so afraid and alone. I was stuck in a rut and fear held me back from everything and everyone. But when I started to reach out and connect again, it started to make that fear dissolve. Connecting with people again and knowing that I wasn’t alone was a big part in overcoming my fears.
Now that is another topic for another time, but I want you to know that you are not alone.
Tell Me How You Fight Your Fears
I hope that these techniques help you. I hope that you feel less afraid and that you are able to take all of this and run with it, even if it’s just getting you that one little step, that will get you out the door or up off the couch.
Let me know how this goes for you. Let me know how you’re conquering your fears! I’d love to hear from you.
Until next time, I’ve been Jamie.